trapped inside my conspiracy of happiness.

Black hole.

We wanted to conquer the world

It would be easy, you said

Decrescendo in a swirl

Regrets, too late

----------------

It sometimes feels surreal, the entire concept of how two people could do things unconditionally for each other. How do people make promises to each other?

Won't there ever be a point where they get tired?

Won't they just stop one day.

What is happiness? Why do people seek for it? Does it exist? What about love? Well, this thing called love, perhaps it was meant to be an unnecessary happiness. 

Technically, we can live without it.

Simply put, we don't need it.

Love, something that people say would make the world go round. But it was never meant to serve its purpose as a merry-go-round. Instead, it's a roller coaster ride.

Fluctuation emotions, hopes, disappointment.

How do you put a stop to that?

First, you have the excitement of getting yourself strapped onto the seat. All excited and ready to set forth on an unexpected journey on the ride. You're trembling with joy and uncertainty.

You try to muster your courage to hold on all the way till the end of the ride.

Gripping the safety harness as tightly as you can, it begins.

You're hoping you can survive it.

You're secretly afraid.

Second, the ride begins. You take a deep breath and enjoy the chatters and laughter around you.

You try to laugh along, getting ready to pose for pictures you could keep forever.

Pictures don't fade away, they will always be there to haunt you.

It's the exciting part, where the ride accelerates.

It halts for a second at the top.

Whoosh.

Third, fun's over. The acceleration gave the thrills, the kick and some form of joy. But the drop was something entirely unexpected. You wouldn't expect it like that.

Well, you had thoughts and expectations of the drop.

But this drop was nothing like you expected.

The person next to you is screaming.

And so are you.

Next, the person beside you has his hands up. He's screaming while he's trying to get your hands up as well. Reluctance to give in, that's what's holding you back.

It was always too hard to conform to that.

The ride is giving you chills and fear.

You scream louder.

When you get off the ride, the most unexpectedly scary ride you have ever been on. You're dizzy from the fall, the screaming, the fear and you want to quickly get out.

You're trying to steady yourself while walking.

Grabbing on to others will make you fall.

You have no choice but to let go.

You're on your own.

Love? I still don't really believe in it.

At the end of the day, I'm alone.

I'm better off alone.

M.

You got to go.