Ctrl+Z. Ctrl+Me.

"Just living is not enough", said the butterfly, "one must have sunshine, freedom, and a little flower."
— Hans Christian Andersen.

this is the best that i've ever been.


The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize the situation is over, you cannot move forward.

 — Steve Maraboli, Unapologetically You: Reflections on Life and the Human Experience.





the bad dream started before you left. it was a nightmare. 

i could see so clearly in the dream —

the pain, the emotions, the energy to run.

but soon it became so salient 

that there was nowhere left to run.

i was trapped in a dream

i didn't want to be trapped in,

i couldn't run out of it,

i couldn't get out

because i wouldn't let it go.


 it was a nightmare;

yet, i kept going back to it.


the blame is the worst.

 the moment it stayed etched in memory,

the thought about it would never leave.

it became haunting,

and i obsessed with the mere worries about it —

the events that have not happened —

and yet, the nagging thought of letting go

couldn't be put into action.

where else can i run to;

if i can't run away from the blame?

forget about it.

forgive me for it.






i'm not happy.
the truth is that i'll never be,
but at least i don't need to pretend.

everything's boring and bleak,
i'm not hoping for better.
i've made my peace,
so i'm laughing.

the truth is i'll never be,
but at least i don't need to pretend.



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