that's all we need.

Now I thought about what I wanna say,

but I never really know where to go.

----------------

The dark room.

Sitting in the middle, she sits on a chair. She moves a little, it creaks. It was flimsy and on the verge ot breaking into pieces. She stops moving. 

The chains.

They hurt, but she liked the pain. She chained herself up, for the fear of what she is best at - self-destruction. The chains restricted the movement. She did not know what to do, she did not know who to talk to.

The silence.

The room was silent. She did not know who to talk to. She did not know what she could do to get out of her situation. The silence was killing her. Should she talk to herself? Perhaps, she should talk herself out of being confined in the room, out of the chains and explore whatever was outside of the room.

The suspense.

She did not know what would be waiting for her on the outside. She was curious. She was afraid of the light. She was afraid that the moment she stepped out of the darkness she would be blinded by the light. She was afraid that if she moved, the chair would creak and break. Splinters would definitely hurt. She was afraid of moving further because she had already had her chains fitted so tightly to her skin.

The dilemma.

She was going to take a step out. She had to get rid of the chains. She had to get out of the chair. She had to get out of the dark room. Was she ready for all that? Taking the first step would hurt, for sure. She was sure of it. But what if it was beautiful outside? What if it was full of colours and rainbows? Like the scenarios she imagined in her head over and over again, like a fairytale story she had read as a kid.

The decision.

She got out. It hurt as hell. To let go of her chain, to get cut by the splinters in the wood.

She was blinded by the light.

She was lost.

She needed help.

She was losing her mind.

He held her, in attempt to guide her out of her misery. He tried to convince her that it would take some time to get used to the light.

With all that she had, the chain still in her hand, she grabbed him, and chained him to her. She wanted to make sure that he wasn't going to harm her, by making her walk into a wall or fall into a drain.

--------

The tighter the chains, the harder it was to break free.

The tighter the chains, the closer to the pain.

Are the chains worth it?

Are the chains needed?

What if the chains were the only way to stop her from delirium?

What if she was already delirious before she could take a step out?

--------

Cause I don't understand,

what else I....

I dont understand,

don't get upset

when I'm not with you.

We're swimming around,

that's what I do

when I'm with you.

Cause I don't know what else I can do.

----------------

M.

because it's all we can take.